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.wistful.They're almost black: the memories.
Ironically fitting, the tint to our clothes and
how you hair was supposed to be but of course that had turned out
unexpected, a little too poetic to mean anything but
brighter is what I need.
And I'll take that optimism and run it up my veins,
- not painfully, don't spare a pause for concern, i'm alright, i promise -
and maybe it'll spark a new light
something to help see better, feel better, breathe better,
anything to remember.
But once I do, it'll only hurt more
and it already hurts plenty without the reminders of
moon-eyes, they were like moons, right?
porcelain, pristine no matter how damaged you swore you were,
a laugh that i knew was music, but what was the tune?
a smile, lips turned up but i can't seem to recall how or why or
where those memories went.
they've got to be here somewhere..
and of course the closeness,
that final moment that passed too quickly of
arms linked, hearts joined, we were so close -
.Withering Ties.What comes with you is withering ties
Run down by distance soaring high
A side of memories to go by
With swollen hopes run sick and dry.
It's broken shards of promise lands
Of shining knights and Peter Pans
To calm your jittery, shaky hands
To drop your fragile grains of sand.
What we once were seems to have flown
Shapen by the sides we've grown
And what we may have never known
Came about when left alone.
It's a new window to look through
Of greener grass that's bright and new
With sunlight to light up your blues
A reflection of me and you.
A ball of wishes waiting
It's magic never fading
The seeds filled with desire
To shoot your hopes up higher.
The stem is plucked without a care
Chance for a wish is equal; fair
Inhale your trust and all you know
Exhale your dreams and let them go.
They'll ride the wind and sail the skies
Whisked away before your eyes
And when they're ready, they will grow
All they need is just a blow.
.Pining.Of urgency and desperation
A heart in need of love's salvation
Send a smile my direction
Trust in me your heart's protection.
A spark was shared between our gaze
Which marked the start of many days
In which I'd drown under your stare
Stripped of thought, you left me bare.
Down to bones, I tend to wonder
If in your mind I ever to wander
Like the child I stoop down to
When it comes to me and you.
I like to think our spark had meaning
Towards destiny I'm often leaning
But even fantasy walks a line
To keep your fate sealed off from mine.
.Spiral.A twisting, turning coil spirals
Lower, lower, 'til it drops
The coil's close to snapping now
Tighter, tighter, 'til it pops.
Hear it snap; fast as a blink
Listen, listen, or you'll miss it
See it spring back; no hestiation
Quickly, quickly, did you see it?
It's not the same, it's broken now
Fix it, fix it, make it better
Before it's rusty and forgotten
Hurry, hurry, put it together.
Time is sprinting much too fast
Slower, slower, can you keep up?
It's fate is sealed; broken forever
Silence, silence eats you up.
.Unconditional.Stunted attention gravitates around two foggy scenes
One of muddy browns, one of looming evergreens
The same abrupt ending to come, the same destiny
Of having to take in the blows and continue moving.
There's always the same blip of thought to get me stumbling
The 'what-if's' that fuel that fire dying to keep burning
But no matter the desperation cycling through my head
I'd rather go down with a smile than be broken and dead.
It's a constant struggle to look forward, ignore the urge to look
But if I do, there's no stopping the automatic hook
I'll flouder and I'll lose my grip just for old time's sake
It's too big of a hole to fill, too big a risk to take.
Those certain songs and memories are pushed away like disease
The wound's too ripe to reminisce, I'll never be at ease
And the moon would be your eyes while the sun would be your smile
And the snapshots would come rushing in, like they have for a while.
So to keep the blistering pain at bay, I'll look off to the side
Pretend that ther
.Facade.A mere sweetness to the eyes
With a gentle voice to add
Not a true threat to the field
In which a heart's moths do flutter.
There's but the smallest stirring
To accompany a lonely smile
Aware of forced love's quaint facade
To lure a heart into deception.
Be it a game of love or lust
A tug of war of 'do's and 'don't's
Or simply a game of pretend
To dress a lone smile with color.
There's a bitter beauty in the cracks
Of a heart that's feigned affection
The hint that what was once reality
Could return if properly coaxed out.
.Ghost.Am I but a ghost for you
The way you are a ghoul for me?
Am I ever just a speeding car
Passing by your highway-mind?
You were my fall-back safety net
To keep me from falling too hard
You were my sane security
To cling to when my bird-heart trembled.
I don't miss your apologies or promises or words
But the intentions behind them; the feel, the touch, the looks
I yearn for nostalgic concern that's faded into speckled papers
The thought that once I had been primary, no longer so expendable.
Now we're trapped in memories; scrapbooks laced with tears
The broken bond and stitched up hearts that beg for a numbing dosage
Now it's saddened hopelessness, desperate for a glimpse to the future
In fear that we may end up with just one love that never lived to blossom.
:.Dream.:Sometimes, when I'm alone and only silence rings through the halls, I'll go into my room and turn the lock.
I grab my headphones and slip them on, powering up my trusty music player then carefully selecting a song.
I close my eyes and wait.
There's a stirring in the room: a quiet rumble as the song starts up. There's only black to see, but my senses kick in as the faint sound of chanting plays into the background.
I open my eyes and the sight before me is stunning.
The walls are no longer a bland eggshell-white, but are loud and ecstatic. They hold a sea of fist-pumps hitting the air as the buzzing of a million fans scream behind the rising action. The guitars pick up the steady beat, swinging hands with the tempo and gliding through the air. They're clustered but casual in movement, dancing as the bass rings through their bodies.
I look out at all of them, a smile on my lips.
I take a deep breath.
The first note is steady and clean as if this wasn't the first time I had bel
BrokenI'm not broken,
Just a little bent.
All those words you've spoken,
Just left me a little dent.
My heart isn't shattered,
It just has a crack.
Sore, bruised, and battered,
But my tears I hold back.
Please don't worry about me.
I'm fine, I swear.
I just want you to see,
That I'm still able to be repaired.
Even though I'm hurt, damaged, and weakened,
Even though I've felt so much pain.
It doesn't mean I'm truly beaten,
It just means that I'll need a little help again.
Bad HabitI think I was your drink of fine wine,
only used when needed from time to time
I'd get you tipsy, as stars collide
Your drunk, slurred words
blending in with mine
(I couldn't even comprehend
when you said it wouldn't happen again)
I think I was your cigarette break
when anxiety filled,
from me, you'd take
One puff here, and one puff there
(I could barely hear
when you said, "I'm sorry, dear")
I think I was your line of cocaine,
thinking I'd be there to ease your pain
I'd bring you higher,
head suspended in clouds
(So I knew it was fake,
when you said, "It was my mistake")
I think I was your bad habit,
and ignorantly, you were mine
You continue to relapse, my dear
But rest assured:
I won't this time.
You were my first
I fell in, immersed
A world of excitement
I smile, extatic
You were fantastic
You were my heart
silly, but smart
Make time slow
I don't want you to go
You always told me
It took some time
I must admit
At first I thought
You wouldn't fit
But now I miss it's true
when the Doctor was you
So before you go
I hope you know
You put on quite a show
Is it too much to ask?I don't understand what's wrong with me today.
It feels like all my of friends have drifted too far away.
I've tried to be strong and fix all I've wronged
But nothing goes according to plan.
And I just want to back up, stop and start over again.
And these days are the loneliest of my life.
It feels like something is wrong but everything seems alright.
Are they trying to avoid me because of being me?
The past is the past but I hope I'm not history...
All I want is someone to talk and stay...with me.
Is it too much to ask for a little time and company?
Maiden of the Olive Oil TreeMaiden of the olive oil tree -
caryatid body, color of cream,
how do you fare against the crumbling temple?
How do you fare against the pressure
weighting upon your chest?
For you have long kept this temple,
broken, like a mother.
You have long adorned it
with your cultivated crest.
But when the framework falters -
the foundation all decaying -
will you climb the olive branches,
free, no more inept?
And bathe in oil satin,
to smooth the ancient scarring,
as time releases tension
from your ankles to your breasts.
HealingHaving the courage to seek forgiveness
Even when things are rough and when
All seems to be
It might take time but
Numbing the pain will make it sting longer and
Grow uncontrollably bigger.
Is not real,
What you say,
Is not what you feel.
Make you rot,
"Who am I?
What am I not?"
Are an illusion,
They give you nothing,
Nothing but confusion.
Blinds the wise,
There is no vision,
In your eyes.
Is the greatest lie,
There is no feeling,
After you die.
Which we create,
Drain our life,
Leave us with hate.
And I have nothing but vanity,
Since nothing is real,
Not even reality.
Boy of the PastSo, tell me, Boy of the Past
Was it worth it in the end
To sit there and pretend
Like the present wouldn’t disappear?
And the future wouldn’t ever near?
Was it worth it to keep those regrets in your life?
The ones you held onto with so much strife?
The ones you couldn’t ever forget?
The ones you couldn’t ever admit?
Was it worth it to hold on
To the pain you placed upon
Yourself with no forgiveness?
Like it was no one else’s business
Was it worth it to see through
The true and only you?
You looked in the mirror and regarded
Only an image that was greatly marréd
Was it worth it to ignore
What, for you, had been still in store?
A life you deemed had no meaning
The regrets constantly intervening
Was it worth it to use that mask?
And never, ever ask?
Bear it all on your own?
Surrounded, yet all alone
Was it worth it to chain
Yourself to all your pain?
To wallow in your shame?
You yourself the one you blamed
Because as I stand here and observe
In the cas
.Reminisce.Remember when we'd sit up against the wall?
Share a laugh, make it up as we went along
And how we were so happy, when it was just two
And how my heart is twisting at the thought of you
Remember swinging high and flipping when you reached the top?
And how thousands of miles couldn't tell our hearts to stop?
And now the mist of rain only speaks your name, no matter what I do
Why can't my heart stop twisting at the thought of you?
Remember our first exchange of words that meant the world?
The tug-of-war that we played as lonely fingers curled
And with the summer waning, I don't know what to do
All I feel's my heart twisting at the thought of you.
Remember our last goodbye, a hug cut short by time?
And how it finally hit me that it might be fine
Though love is never-ending, and hearts can go on, too
My heart is always twisting at the thought of you.
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More